Negative self-talk

I beat myself up.  It's a horrible habit I have.  I'm working on reducing the amount of negative self-talk I have, and since I've been eating better and exercising more, it's getting better.  I no longer have guilt over what I'm eating.  I do, however, have worrying thoughts of failure.  I'm afraid I am going to end up sabotaging my efforts.  I'm afraid I am losing weight too quickly, and too easily.  I'm afraid I am going to plateau and lose my momentum.  It's silly, self-defeating talk that I need to stop. 

I look at what I've accomplished in the last five weeks.  Yes, just five weeks!  I started this "diet" purely by chance.  An upset stomach during my birthday weekend resulted in missing my birthday dinner at my favorite steak house.  It morphed into a strange loss of taste for fatty, sugary foods.  A reset button was pushed on my appetite and I am so grateful for it. 

Five weeks later, I'm down from 291 to 264.  I haven't been this "small" in three years or more.  I'm anxious to get into the 250s soon, so I can comfortably say I'm back at my previous weight, the weight I was at when I  met and married my first husband.  The weight I stayed at for a good six years until I started a low carb crash diet.  Five weeks is all it's taken me to lose 27 pounds.  I feel smaller.  When I put my hands on my hips, I can feel that my body has changed.  My clothes are too loose.  I bought a dress yesterday, and I plan to wear it out on a date with my husband on Thursday.  I haven't comfortably worn a dress in a long time.  I look at the number 264 and think it's way too large, too big, too unhealthy.  In comparison to 291 it's a good number, and I need to be proud of not only having a smaller weight but the choices I'm making to get there.

Negative talk needs to stop, and I need to focus on the things I'm doing well.  Easier said than done though.