Update

I've had a little "hiccup" with my motivation.
My weight is up, but fortunately only slightly.  I can cope with a 2-3 pound gain.  I'm confident I will be back where I was in no time.
I feel amazing.  Yoga has helped me be centered and in touch with my body.  Now I've just got to work on getting my eating back under control.

and the doc said...

I had an appointment for my yearly with the gyno today.  She was THRILLED with how I'm doing.  By her scale, I'm down 68 pounds.  My blood pressure has gone from 120/76 to 104/66.  All of my bloodwork looks amazing and I couldn't be happier.  I am still overweight and would like to lose more, but the progress I've made is awesome.  I'm so happy to be this healthy!  What a difference 10 months can make!

slow!

The weight is coming off slowly now and I honestly don't mind.  I'm exercising regularly so now it's toning more than weight loss.  I'm in 14s and XL tops, which means I can shop in regular stores.  My BMI has gone from 47 to 35.  My confidence has gone from 10 to 100.  I feel good, I look good, and I am proud of myself.  I know more weight will continue to come off, and I'm ok with that happening slowly.  I never wanted to feel like I was being deprived of anything, and I never wanted to beat myself up if I did eat something like a brownie.  Having done low carb in the past has messed with my head in that regard for sure, because I do still sometimes get down on myself when I eat something that isn't the healthiest choice.  I'm working on that.

the scale

I've moved it into the closed spare bedroom.  I cannot tell you what a relief it is to not be weighing every day.

hey!

No, I didn't disappear!  Life has been incredibly hectic and busy lately, and I have stopped obsessing about my eating and exercising because it's become routine.  I work out at least four times a week.  And by work out, I mean exercise!  Some days it's 20 min hard on the elliptical followed by weights, or I might run 4 miles or bike 7+.  I love exercising!  Not the actual exercise, but the feeling of accomplishment afterward.  My goal is to be comfortable enough with my body to wear sleeveless tops this summer and NOT freak out about how flabby my arms are.
Speaking of body comfort, I'm still a bit disgusted with my stomach.  Otherwise I'm happy with my body for the most part.  Wait-- did I just say that?  Yes!  I did!  I've lost a lot of weight in my face, which pleases me greatly.  My legs are rock solid.  My arms are getting there.  I haven't lost my boobs, which is good and bad.  I'm way top heavy for sure.  People are often amazed when I put my wide belt on over my shirt-- they don't realize I have a waist because of my boobs!  My stomach though... it's still flabby and BIG.  At least I think it is.  It sticks out a lot.  If I could change one thing about my body it would definitely be my stomach.  I guess we'll see what happens as I keep working out.  I've only been at it for 9 months now and you can't expect miracles overnight, right?

slacking more

I've been slacking on my blog.  Sorry.
On the weight loss front, I'm in plateau stage.  Big time.  I expected it, considering I dropped almost 70# in 7 months and have allowed desserts to creep back into my daily routine.  I'm working on it.  Today was day two of cleaner eating.  One think I've been really good about is exercising.  I religiously work out vigorously at least 4 times a week.  I'm talking 45-60 minute workouts where I sweat a lot.  Today I finished a treadmill 5k in under 35 minutes.  I didn't run the whole way, but over half so that's good.
I'm excited to start losing again.  I know I can and I know I need to.  My work here isn't done!

satisfied?

I'm struggling lately because I have plateaued.  I'm seeing a minimal loss lately, and even a gain sometimes.  Nothing major-- I'm just fluctuating between 221-223.  I'm sure a lot of it is water retention due to my period, or something similar, but it's frustrating when I'm used to seeing consistent loss each week.  I'm not dissatisfied though.  I'm down about 70 pounds since I started this journey in June.  That's a lot of weight!  I look better, I feel amazingly better, I'm able to shop in "regular" stores and I have so much more energy than I have in a long, long time.  Why is it then that I am disgusted with my huge flabby stomach?  It seriously sticks way out and just hangs there.  When I run, it flops around if I'm not wearing the right clothing.  I guess everyone has something they dislike about their body and that's mine?  I don't know.  I just wish I could be completely satisfied with my body for once.
In other news, I'm quickly shaving time off my mile time.  Yesterday I was under 11 minutes.  Still waaaaaay slow by most peoples' standards, and I'm no way ready for a marathon or even a half marathon, but it's an accomplishment for me... especially when you consider I remember huffing and puffing my way through a 15 minute mile jog.